Quoteables

A couple minutes after applying a first coat of polish on her nails,  3-year-old niece Bethany reminds her mom,
"Aunt Katie needs to do a double-jacket on my nails!"
*   *   *
Andrew:  (eyeing something new on the kitchen counter, half disgusted) Mom, what is that?
Mom:  That's deodorant, but it's for women.
Andrew:  It STINKS!
Mom:  (feeling a little defensive)  Andrew, it's unscented and it's new and closed.

(pause)

Mom:  You smell dinner!

(Ham and bean soup, which happens to be one of my favorite smells!)